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Funny News jokes: Vibe Awards, Nelly, Usher, Naomi Campbell, O.D.B., Nicollette Sheridan, Mariah Carey

~ Mariah Carey delivered a touching eulogy for her friend and collaborator O.D.B. She wept, "I love 'Old Dirty' so much. Because when I stood next to him, I seemed like only a HALF-crazy bitch."

  There was a stabbing and a hip-hop awards show broke out! HA! Stoooopid.

Usher and supermodel Naomi Campbell's relationship is now public. But not everything is perfect. The two famous lovebirds are reportedly very jealous of each others' abs.

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~ The PG-rated "sex" scene on Monday Night Football with Terrell Owens and Nicollette Sheridan is being investigated by the FCC after it received thousands of complaint calls from racist rednecks. One redneck defended his bigotry by shouting, "You seen what happen the last time one a' them colored football players got one a' err blonde white women. Boy lost his mind. STABBED her to death!" Jerry Falwell then strapped on his pointy white hat and started doing the T.O. touchdown dance. 

 

~ Rap star Nelly's latest album features a collaboration with a country music star. Hillbillies blasted the "pollution" of their pure white music

by burning a cross on Nelly's yard while singing "It's Hot in Here."

~ The Hog-Wild News Network International has been compiled from various sources including but not limited to the Daily Newspapers, Internet Findings, Popular Magazines, and your mom.

Reproduction of this newscast, such as charging admission for its re-telecast while not offering a cold beverage, without prior written consent will be considered sexual harassment and is punishable by law, lawyers, and rednecks with shotguns. 

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