Web Site Name Game 

by  HogWild

I’ve discovered the BEST new game! I came up with it one day while “RESEARCHING” on the Net. I was like totally bored with the endless mundane montage of mountainous melons and I decided to try my luck. So I started typing in names for websites to see if they existed.

Seeing that I was smiling, it wasn’t long until Jeremy the Bloated Jew wanted to reverse my countenance. But I would not let him bring me down! In fact, I let him in on the game of Random URLs. Here’s how you play:

Player 1 makes up a website like, nipplesonfire.com  Player 2 then has to say whether it exists or not. Player 2 places his wager (between 10 and 200) based on how confident he is. First player to reach 1000 wins! Or you could like play with REAL units, but I’m too thrifty for all that. So Jeremy and I played this game for alternative stakes. If I won, he had to sing “Rubber Ducky” while splashing water in his San Francisco Bay sized bellybutton. That ALWAYS cracks me up! If HE won, I had to stop calling him “bloated Jew” for 3 months and instead call him, Jeremy the Studly Jew. So, you see this was SERIOUS. No way, I’m gonna LIE to my Hogstas! I had to WIN this battle!

Here is how it went down. Now the results were accurate when we played, but I can’t say these URL’s aren’t actual sites NOW. You’ll just have to find out fer yerselves.

I got to go first because I’m HogWild and he’s bloated bag of lard. He began with

AMAZINGLYLARGEBREASTS.COM

Hog: Hmm, that’s a tough one Jeremy. Lots of “research” sites out there. But is this a reasonable name for a site. Hmm. If it DOES exist, it certainly is a site I’d have to “monitor” for my Community Service, “Pervert Patrol Program.” Ya know, I have to find these DISGUSTING sites first, and then make good, clean people aware to NOT visit them. And of course, all the time gathering (downloading) evidence. But anyway, I’ll bet 200 that it DOES exist.

Survey Says . . .   NO!!!!

Hog: Damn it Jeremy!

SCORE: Hog  -200  Jeremy 0

Hog: Okay Jeremy. My website is

VAGINAWARS.COM

Jeremy: Well, I’ve never gone to BATTLE with a vagina, I say . . .

Hog: Yeah, that’s because you keep waving your little white flag!

Jeremy: Anyway, I’ll bet 100 and say, it DOES exist. Probably a comedy site. One with REAL jokes, not like HOGWILD.NET

Hog: Well you’re WRONG! VAGINAWARS.COM does NOT exist!

Jeremy: And neither do funny jokes on your site.

Hog: Shut up. You’re supposed to be supportive. You’re my webmasturbator for Moses’ sake!

SCORE: Hog  -200   Jeremy   -100

Hog: Okay my turn

Jeremy: What do you think of

MONKEYPOOP.COM

Hog: Oh, that’s gotta exist! I’ll bet 200 that it does!

Jeremy: It does.

Hog: YES! MONKEYPOOP on YOU! I’m back at Zero baby!

Jeremy: yeah, you’re a zero alright.

SCORE Hog: 0   Jeremy –100

Hog: Okay Bagel Boy, let’s stay with the monkey theme. I say,

JIZMONKEY.COM 

Jeremy: I bet there’s some sick people out there who actually made a site out of that. I’ll bet 200 that it DOES exist.

Hog: Well . . . it DOESN’T!! JIZMONKEY.COM!! Ha! Who would want to make a site about your mom anyway!

SCORE: Hog 0  Jeremy –300

Jeremy: Ok Hog. Now Ill get ya.

CRACKADDICTS.COM

Hog: Ooooh good one. Yeah, okay, CRACK ADDICTS have assembled to create entrepreneurial synergy. And they hired a web site developer by paying him with all that extra cash they have laying around. C’mon now. I bet 200 and say NO!

Jeremy: you’re right.

Hog: YES!

SCORE: Hog 200   Jeremy –300

Hog: Okay Jeremy the Bloated Bull Frog, let’s go with

HOMELESSANDCRUSTY.COM

Jeremy: Is that the best you could do? I bet 200 and say no.

Hog: Damn it!

SCORE: Hog 200 Jeremy  -100

Jeremy: 

FARTJELLY.COM

Hog: Good Grief Charlie Bloated Brown! What the hell is Fart Jelly? Is that like, gelatinous caramel that drips from your bottom after a nasty taco squirt?  Eeeeeew! I bet 200 and say no.

Jeremy: you got it.

Hog: No, YOU got it. I don’t want no FART jelly!

SCORE: Hog 400 Jeremy -100

Hog: All righty Jeremiah. Think about this one carefully. Because ya NEVER know.

 www.CROOKEDPENIS.com

Jeremy: my oh my. There ARE a lot of adult sites out there. I’d have to say . . . well, so far only 1 site has actually been real. And crookedpenis DOES sound kinda ridiculous.

Hog: Did you say crooked penis sounded re-DICK-u-lus? I don’t think it’s polite to make fun of those with bent boppers.

Jeremy: I’ll bet just 50 and say it DOESN’T exist.

Hog: WRONG-O!! It redirects you to a site for plastic surgery! Ha!

SCORE: Hog 400 Jeremy –150

Jeremy: ok, how about

IFOUNDCORN.COM

Hog: no. no way. 200 that it does not exist.

Jeremy: man, you must spend 24 hours a day on the net!

Hog: you Daaaaaaamn right!

SCORE Hog 600  Jeremy  -150

Hog: Okay J.

LOOSESTOOL.COM

Jeremy: That’s about as gross as ifoundcorn.com But I bet there’s some drug company that has it or something. Some diarrhea drug. I’ll bet 200 and say yes.

Hog: Damn you and your loose stools! You’re right.

SCORE: Hog  600  Jeremy  50

Jeremy: How’s about 

RICKYMARTINISQUEER.COM

Hog: Actually, that’s the domain name I was going to register for my site. Nah man, there ain’t no such site. I bet 200 on no.

Jeremy: you got it

SCORE: Hog 800  Jeremy 50

Hog: You are getting crushed! I can’t wait to hear the Ducky Song! Okaybe, Jeremy. Is this a domain name:

GAYFARMERS.COM

Jeremy: ooh tough one. Sounds like it should be one.

Hog: Are you visualizing shirtless muscle men in denim overalls?

Jeremy: Oh God no! It’s not a site. I bet 200.

Hog: Dagnammit!

SCORE: Hog 800  Jeremy 250

Hog: Okay Jeremy. I can win on this one. One more and I’ll be watching you sing Rubber Ducky while you're plunging your thumb into your flooded bellybutton. Total Humiliation will be mine! Ha ha ha! HAHA!

Jeremy: Not so fast, Skeletor. I WAS gonna give you

ROSIEODDONNELLISABIGFATBITCH.COM

But instead I’ll give you a toughie. It sounds gross, but you know those adult sites . . .

FLAPPINGLABIA.COM

Hog: I gotta bet 200 for the win. But let me think here. Okay, while Labia is one of my favorite words, what are the chances some 15 year old porn web site manager in Germany who runs a site like that has even heard of that word? Much less to be so clever as to add the totally nizASTY action of “flapping.” I’ll say no.

Jeremy: Rubber Ducky, you’re the one . . . you make bath time so much fun . . .

Hog: HA! Yes! Take off the shirt Big Gutski man! On second thought, leave it on! Leave it on! Good God! Did you inhale a cotton candy machine?

FINAL SCORE: Hog 1000  Jeremy 250

Winner: HogWild

Now play at home with your friends!