Janet Jackson's Super Bowl Halftime Peep Show

by HogWild

1. "This was the biggest embarrassment in Texas since George Bush was governor. In fact, it was the biggest BOOB we've seen in Texas since George Bush was governor."

2. If you guys looked closely, you could see the referees going nuts on the field!

- Illegal use of hands! (And they made the squeeze the boobies motion)

- Justin Timberlech is out of bounds!

- More than 2 uprights on the field!

C. Janet cries for her big brother Michael to defend her. But instead of KICKING his ass, Justin is still young enough that Michael would rather TOUCH his ass.

Fo. Disturbing trend for Lustin' Timberlake: first he had 19 year old Britney. Then 31 year old Cameron Diaz. Now 37 year old Janet. Who's next? 52 year old Cher? Liz Taylor? An orgy with the cast of the Golden Girls?

5. "The real question is: Why did Janet have a Chinese Star on her nipple? Is she fighting crime at night?"

Janet flies an invisible plane to Afghanistan. Shocks and Awes Osama with her booby, rips the Chinese star off her milk spigot, throws it and slices off his beard-- zapping him of all his power!

VI. Justin's girlfriend Cameron Diaz can't believe Justin broke her trust by bringing publicity to another woman.

7. What's the big deal with this whole thing? Janet's not even the first Jackson to bare her boobies! She's not even the first cast member of Different Strokes to bare her boobies! And this isn't even the first time Justin has done this. He did it when he was in NSYNC. We all saw Joey Fatone's right mooter.

Ocho. At the Janet Jackson Halftime Peep Show, All 47,000 male members of the Japanese media prematurely popped their flashes.

9. Sex sells. But we've seen it before. People STILL won't buy Janet's music if it stinks.

But if her MUSIC is good, sure, people will throw down their hard earned dollar to buy a blank CD-R to burn it from Kazaa.

Ten. Janet's stunt pissed off the 13 erection dysfunction medications sponsoring the Super Bowl because every guy who thought he couldn't get it up suddenly did at half time and cancelled their subscriptions to Viagrow.

11. Spike Lee now plans to make a movie based on a inter-racial pop stars in lust: Jingle Fever. I know: Stoooooooopid!

11b. A lot of nubs thought the Justin and Janet thing was hot. Not me. I think PDA is gross.

12. Was this whole thing planned? By who? The NFL? No! CBS? No! Microsoft?! Hell yeah!! This was the most replayed event in TIVO history. Now every guy is running out to get a Tivo because God forbid us guys don't miss the next worldwide pervert moment. It could happen at any time! Gotta get Tivo! Don't want to miss an accidental showing of pubes by the Russian diving team at the Summer Olympics. Or maybe Kofi Annan will forget to zip up his pants when he addresses the United Nations.

CONCLUSION: So this is what will be remembered. Janet Jackson's half time peep show. Boner commercials. And oh yeah, the greatest Super Bowl ever played.
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