MySpace
jokes. Secrets your MySpace profile reveals about you. Twisted Humor. |
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MySpace Jokes + Twisted Humor by HogWild Secrets your MySpace Profile Reveals about You... If you're a girl... and your profile background features floating animated hearts... cut that sh!t out. It was cute for 30 seconds, but now it makes me want to stab Bambi in the eye with a sharpened #2 pencil. If you're a guy... and your profile background features floating animated hearts... you might as well replace them with little floating animated d!cks. If you're a girl.... and you proudly display your ample cleavage but not one of your photos shows you from below the waist... you are lying in the part of your profile that says, "I enjoy exercise."
If you're a girl... and your main profile
pic is of you and a guy... he is your boyfriend and you are really in
love. If you're a girl... and in any of your pics you are wearing high heels but you're definitely not dressed to leave your bedroom... you're a whore.
If you're a girl... and any of your pictures
feature you sticking out your ass and turning around to leer at the
camera... you're a whore.
If you're under 15 and in any of those
poses... you're a W.I.T.
If your main photo is a dog, a
sunset, a
celebrity or anything other than a picture of yourself...
you think you
are hideously unattractive. But listen, "hideous" is a very strong word.
And so is "monstrous." Use either. If you listed your favorite music as "I like everything!"... then you are a big f*cking liar. Because NO BODY likes Kevin Federline's crappy songs. If all your profile pictures are of you as a little child... then you have a face that only a mother could love. But obviously not YOUR mother since it looks like she pushed your fat head into a toilet bowl full of battery acid. If under Favorite Books you wrote-in even more of your favorite TV shows... then scoop that lumpy mushy thing out of your head because the inside of your skull would be better used to store your keys and cell phone. If under Favorite Books you wrote: "Us Weekly"... you should immediately set your microwave to "baked potato" and stick your head inside for 60 seconds. If you have a MySpace page... in 2016 you will be reminiscing with your friends, "Hey, remember back-in-the-day when everyone had an iPod, wore t-shirts with obnoxious slogans and had a, (tee-hee-hee) MySpace page! HA HA HA! That was so g@y!
You'll be saying that while wearing one of
those new animated t-shirts with the little floating d!cks on it.
My MySpace with little floating animated d!cks on it: http://myspace.com/hogwildcomedy Get the HogWild Newsletter with Funny Pictures + Jokes!
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MySpace
jokes. Secrets your MySpace profile reveals about you. Twisted Humor.
|
| EXPERT DATING ADVICE | DATING ADVICE | DATING COACH | MEMBERS | STORE | FUNNY PICTURES | FUNNY RANTS | COMEDY VIDEOS | DATING ADVICE MAN | CARTOONS | CHATS | GAMES | LINKS | COMEDY SHOWS | CONTACT | JOIN NOW | |