NOTE: I know no one has said "psyche" since 1989 but I felt like it because I'm bringing it back!

NOTE: Psyche!

Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan battle Christmas Carol style with their rendition of Deck the Halls!

Sing to the tune of Deck the Halls!

PARIS HILTON:
Deck the ho she's coked up and whore-y
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

LINDSAY LOHAN:
If you got pregnant you'd wind up on Maury!
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

LINDSAY LOHAN:
In a public men's room you frolic
Fa la la, la la la, la la la.

PARIS HILTON:
You're a fire-crotch alcoholic!
Fa la la, la la la, la la la.

LINDSAY LOHAN:
You bleach blonde b!tch with a broken nose!
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

PARIS HILTON:
You snort cocaine with a garden hose!
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

PARIS HILTON:
May all your Christmases be white with coke...
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

LINDSAY LOHAN:
Swallow Santa's egg nog 'til you choke!
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

PARIS HILTON:
Rudolph ain't the only one with a red nose!
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

LINDSAY LOHAN:
Grab an elf's Yule Log and strike a pose!
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

LINDSAY LOHAN:
'Tis the season to stop bickering
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

PARIS & LINDSAY:
'Cause neither of us can act or sing!
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

PARIS HILTON:
Hey, something smells like sperm. Lindsay, did you fart?

LINDSAY LOHAN:
No! If I farted, it would smell like your boyfriend's tongue!

PARIS HILTON:
Fire-crotch!

LINDSAY LOHAN:
Whore-box!