Okay, I'm going to get personal here. I am performing an experiment. I am trying to not touch myself for 1 week.

I have completed Day 5. If you missed it, see Day 1 & 2 and Day 3 and Day 4.

This lack of self-smack has put me on edge and I think it's affecting my game with the laaaaaaay-deez. Instead of being calm and cool, I'm all jumpy and salivating.

I'm stuttering around girls like I'm a teenager again.

I thought I would lose interest in sex. I thought I would turn into a Grandma and start wearing a sweater with a cat on it, playing solitaire on Saturday nights.

But no. I'm still a horndog.

NOTE: A horndog is like a corndog, in that they are both found in abundance in high school cafeterias.

I feel like I can last the entire week but it's a terrible way to live.

This is like holding in a fart.

You COULD do it. But why?

It hurts like hell and you know when you release it's going to feel sooooo good.